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Wanting kids isn’t just the social norm, it’s said to be a biological imperative, the only supposed “duh” of evolution. But yet, some of us choose not to—and for good reason. For anyone that’s been made to feel defensive abut their choice to live childfree, here are nine silly things people say when they find out you don’t see kids in your future (and how to counter them).

1. “You’ll change your mind.” If anyone says this to you past age twenty five, just return their condescending smile and say one day they’ll change their mind about their partner, career choice or spirituality. See how they like it.

2. “You should at least have one of your own.” Children aren’t raffle tickets that will be gone by the time the party is over. They are people who require care, feeding, and a lifetime commitment. There’s no sense in testing the waters if it's something you’re not prepared for, or ready, to do. According to a recent survey among professors of Environmental Science and Forrestry, overpopulation is the greatest threat to our environment. So if you’ve made the personal choice to remain childless, tell them they can take solace in the fact that your decision can be seen as a green one.

Read on for all nine typical responses, and how to combat them.

Don’t want kids? You’re not alone in your pursuit to live childfree.

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