Unfortunately, the dearest holiday wishes of most ten-month-old babies sadly go unnoticed thanks to their only real skill on Santa’s lap being to cry, pee, or, if their parents are truly blessed, mug for the camera cutely.
Fortunately, the author of the ugly volvo is here to help with a definitive list of what that baby really wants for Christmas.
I am a ten-month-old baby and I write because my mother has been sending out my “Christmas List” to people, and her list does not in any way represent the things I really want. I could give two s#*ts about receiving stacking cups.
And I know you’re ready to make the joke about ten month-old babies and how all we want is the wrapping paper and the boxes. Touché, Santa. Touché. We do, of course, want those things. But I have a number of additional things I want very badly.
My list is enclosed below. Have a lovely holiday.
-Ten Month-Old Baby
1. This laptop cord
I want this laptop cord more than I have ever wanted anything. Please. I also want the power strip with the orange on/off button and the white label on the other cord pictured (the one not connected to the laptop). I would be ok with just a bunch of electrical cords in general, but I would really love these specific ones that are located behind my mother’s desk next to the air-conditioner (whose cord I also want).
2. This wall mount entertainment center
I have no idea why my mother does not want me to play with this thing, as it is obviously a child’s toy. I would like one for my room.
Full story at the ugly volvo.
Making baby happy.
Photo credits: Annie Colbert & the ugly volvo
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