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Does living together before marriage lead to divorce?

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Reports keep coming out saying that couples who live together before marriage show higher divorce rates than couples who wait to cohabitate for a ring. While the black-and-white numbers are telling, they don’t tell the whole story. The correlation between divorce rate and cohabitation has a lot more to it than jumping into a serious commitment before being ready. Variables such as motivation behind sharing a space have an impact on the divorce rate as well.

In our try it before you buy it culture, it makes sense that couples would choose to live together before committing their entire lives in marriage. After all, if you're not compatible, why spend all that money for the wedding and the inevitable divorce? Does living together before marriage doom you to a divorce? Read studies and learn about living together before marriage to find out.

Full story at HowStuffWorks.com.

Total aggregation of HowStuffWorks.com.

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Comments (5)

Feb 24, 2010
me! said...
Oh come on!!! What doesn't match doesn't match! Check who really orders this kind of surveys.
Feb 24, 2010
Joe Buhler said...
Well, Howstuffworks might apply to a lot of topics but this is probably not one of them. Maybe I'm the exception to the rule but it sure doesn't apply to me.
Feb 24, 2010
Peter said...
Marriage isn't about compatibility, it's about commitment. Living together is a demonstrated *lack* of commitment, expressing a "wait and see" attitude. People who are encouraged to dabble in commitment aren't likely to easily commit well to marriage, hence the higher divorce rates, IMHO.

But again, marriage isn't about compatibility. It's about creating a solid foundation from which to learn to grown together. If your marriage was going through deep trouble, but you knew that divorce wasn't an option (because marriage is about *commitment*) , you would do what it takes to bridge the gaps and learn to live and love each other well. And in those darkest period, what a thing to hold on to: the knowledge that your mate isn't going anywhere and will help see you through it.

The "getting to know you part" is better left to dating, with an understanding that, if I fall in love with this person, I'll commit to doing what it takes to create a healthy relationship in which divorcing isn't an option.

Feb 25, 2010
I am a believer in living with you partner before you marry. After divorce many people are a little commitment shy, so take a couple of months to figure out if you can live with someone before you go down the marriage road again. Having to go through divorce is a very painful process and if you can take steps to be completely sure about your decision. Why Not!!
Feb 26, 2010
sharongilo said...
Much more needs to be understood about the general statistics ... I do think in our culture, living together helps a couple to better judge the relationship's sustainability ... particularly when we no longer have much of a dating culture in which to get to know each other ...
www.ashortguidetoahappymarriage.com

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