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If Dr. Seuss had written 50 Shades of Grey

587px-Ted_Geisel_NYWTS

Well, one thing’s for sure; it still wouldn’t be appropriate for kids.

Redditor Traceofbass decided to take a stab at Seuss-ifying the smut that rocked book clubs everywhere, a snippet of which follows:

Here there are spoilers,
Of a lewd little tail,
About a man named Christian,
His last name not Bale.
Oh the places you’ll go!
Under whipdoozles and chainflams,
Into crosswhizzles and jimjams!
Into bondage and bruising,
And handcuffs and lugrams!

Read the rest at Reddit via Geekosystem.

Not children’s literature.

Photo credit: Library of Congress

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