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Is divorce contagious?

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Grab the Purell because new research says divorce can be contagious. The stress and intense emotions involved in a marriage dissolution can spread like a virus among friends and families of the splitting couple.

A team of sociologists and psychologists from three U.S. universities found that a break-up between immediate friends increases a person’s own chances of splitting with their partner by 75 percent. The effect, dubbed “divorce clustering” by researchers, drops to 33 percent if the divorce occurs between friends of a friend. The study also found that people with a divorced sibling face a 22 percent increased chance of getting divorced.

Full story at UK Telegraph.

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Comments (8)

Jul 06, 2010
Bill Scherer said...
I am so ready to take that plunge.
Jul 06, 2010
Molly Monet said...
I have been so happy since my divorce that I can see why others would want to follow in my footsteps. Even my ex has been amazed at how much better off I seem. This is one of my blog posts on the topic. http://www.postcardsfromapeacefuldivorce.com/202/so-what-im-still-a-rockstar/
Jul 07, 2010
James U said...
Learn how to choose a better mate. I grew up in a conservative part of the country (Louisiana) where you didn't divorce unless he/she beats, cheats, or leaves. The key is to know who YOU are before you go merging in with someone else who doesn't know who THEY are. If people would stop getting married after a year or less they would figure out what they want out of life and a mate and make a better decision, they wouldn't regret or want to undo later.

I married my wife after 6 years of dating and this month is our 6th wedding anniversary. So after 12 years I know the tension, family and how to handle/diffuse both.

Of course it's contagious, quitting is easy, making it work, is work. And people don't want to do it anymore.

Jul 07, 2010
Molly Monet said...
I understand your logic, James, however there are many cases in which divorce is preferable to staying in a miserable relationship. Studies have shown that kids do better with a peaceful divorce than they do when their parents stay together in conflict. Also, when a man has become violent, cheats, or leaves (as was this case with me), it's good to make the best of the situation. I worked very hard to keep my marriage together and we made it 13 years but I am much happier now that he has left. I invite you to check out my blog on this topic. http://www.postcardsfromapeacefuldivorce.com
Jul 07, 2010
Mike said...
I'm going to have to side with James here, especially until Molly posts links to "studies" that have shown not only her side of the story but the other in regards to kids being better off after a divorce versus working it out.

I can understand when beating or violence is involved, but cheating can be worked out, leaving... well what are you going to do if the person isn't present, right?

Same boat as you James, we just celebrated our 6 year in May. We dated for 6 years before popping the question, engaged for 1.5 for a grand total of 13.5 years now. That says a lot for meeting on a blind date in our freshman year in college... Marriage takes work, plain and simple. The problem is that we as a society see divorce as a do-over or a mulligan and don't want to put in the effort required. This blog entry is about giving a person a reason to quit, not that it's really contagious. It just amplifies the problems you have, and instead of fixing them, taking the easy way out.

Jul 08, 2010
James U said...
Wow this thing just ate my last comment. - lame!

I hate when I can't fully remember what I wrote when something like that happens.

Molly, read a couple blogs, I'm glad you're happy. Mike, congrats, I met my wife in 1st semester of college as well, 1997.

Mike you're last sentence nailed it. "This blog entry is about giving a person a reason to quit, not that it's really contagious. It just amplifies the problems you have, and instead of fixing them, taking the easy way out."

Although negative thoughts of divorce isn't directed to all divorce's, for people to know how easy it is to "quit" the marriage it doesn't give them much ground to stand on when a "Better looking" option is there that inevitably is the snake with the apple saying "It's ok you can quit, you don't need them anyway"

There's a bigger issue here, which is the unraveling of humanity's moral fiber. But then we'd be here a while with that discussion.

My dad left my mom 4 days after my own wedding after nearly 24 years. He didn't want to stick around even when my mom stuck it out after the majority of the 80s he spent, drinking, cheating, and beating her, myself and my brothers.

I had a long talk with my wife about how I want to be a totally different person, a better person than my father. I told her that i'm "All in", my cards are on the table and i'm going to be as transparent as possible. If people can push priority to communication then they can work through problems with an open heart and an open mind. Sure give them space when they need it but get the closure that's needed to move on without a second thought.

Jul 08, 2010
Molly Monet said...
Here's the link to the study that I was referring to. http://news.yahoo.com/s/livescience/divorcenotalwaysbadforkids
Jul 13, 2010
If you are thinking of divorce please discuss the matter with an attorney to be fully aware of the consequences.

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