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The White House responds to Death Star petition


All right, Star Wars fans and signers of the We the People petition for the U.S. government to build its own Death Star, the verdict is in, and if it doesn’t make you happy, at least it offers up a few laughs in exchange for dominance of the galaxy.

Paul Shawcross, Chief of the Science and space Branch at the White House Office of Management and Budget (and owner of business cards the size of 3”x5” notecards) broke the bad news today but managed to make our space endeavors look pretty impressive, nevertheless.

A few of the big reasons are as follows:

– The construction of the Death Star has been estimated to cost more than $850,000,000,000,000,000. We’re working hard to reduce the deficit, not expand it.

– The Administration does not support blowing up planets.

– Why would we spend countless taxpayer dollars on a Death Star with a fundamental flaw that can be exploited by a one-man starship?

Hmm, excellent points. The bright side, though?

We don’t have a Death Star, but we do have floating robot assistants on the Space Station, a President who knows his way around a light saber and advanced (marshmallow) cannon, and the Defense Advanced Research Projects Agency, which is supporting research on building Luke’s arm, floating droids, and quadruped walkers.

We are living in the future! Enjoy it. Or better yet, help build it by pursuing a career in a science, technology, engineering or math-related field. The President has held the first-ever White Housescience fairs and Astronomy Night on the South Lawn because he knows these domains are critical to our country’s future, and to ensuring the United States continues leading the world in doing big things.

Yep, kiddos, keep studying STEM fields! Your science and math teachers are never going to let you live this one down.

Full story at We the People.

Governing with a dash of humor.

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